Networking Events are Draining
I have been in spaces that look incredible on paper—a really cool location, easy valet parking, an opportunity to put on fancy clothes, and a room full of local movers and shakers. Whether it’s a holiday party, a birthday, or a high-end business event, I enjoy a reason to dress up. Recently though, I have been realizing something about myself that I want to lean into.
Years ago, I never would have thought a room full of business leaders could be draining. I was born ALL extrovert. Lots of words, high energy, “never met a stranger,” etc… Until recently, I would have said big rooms full of lots of business people is simply “networking.” I don’t think this anymore.
I’ve learned through my coaches that once I start denying a pattern of my own behavior, I am "pretending not to know." And every time I act like I enjoy a big networking room where you have to saddle up to conversations and guess who is best to talk to, I leave mad at myself.
The dream life I am building is curating a global ecosystem of entrepreneurs who sell with and through one another’s networks. To do that, I don't need tons of random people. I need the right people—curious people who ask questions, rather than just talking about themselves. People who want the same things I do.
Every time I act like I’ll find this in big spaces, I end up sad and mad. So, I resolve to:
Be real about my boundaries (and stop pretending wrong-fit spaces are okay).
Prioritize curiosity over small talk (and seek out true listeners).
Insist on curated facilitation (where hosts take personal responsibility for connecting the right people).
Protect my limited time on Earth for high-alignment connections.
You can't control how a room is hosted or if strangers are self-absorbed. However, you can control where you choose to show up and how you protect your energy.
What is your rule for networking events?
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